NICU Follow-up

*sigh*
Is it too much to ask for a good day? For all of the hard work both Naysa and I have been putting in to pay off? I just feel like it's one disappoint after another lately. She hasn't been doing as well as she was with tummy time and sitting up as she was before the seizure monster decided to pay her visits. It's frustrating for me and I know it is for her. It breaks my heart to see other children her age crawling, walking, talking...like it's second nature and here she is still struggling to learn to sit up unsupported. Today we had a NICU follow-up and despite everything she's not doing, I put my rose colored glasses on and went in hopeful. The doctor was wonderful, she was warm and understanding which made the two hour appointment a lot more pleasant than it could have been. We started with questions about her medical history and development then moved on to a physical. Her height, weight and head circumference are all on track :) The doctor put small red blocks on a table in front of Naysa to test her grabbing skills and the results weren't very encouraging. I can sit here all day and make excuses as to why. She was tired, she's never held blocks, she hasn't been feeling well but at the end of the day, I am realistic. Her vision issues play a huge part in her lacking motor skills. According to the doctor she is currently at the cognitive level of a 5 month old. I don't know what I expected, it's obvious she is behind and I knew she was going to have a harder time development wise. I guess up until now no one has really said it though, we always just focus on how far she's come. It's been a hard dose of reality that I wasn't quite prepared for. I spoke with the neurologist today as well, tomorrow she will start Topamax in addition to the Zonegran and B6 so hopefully that will keep the monster at bay. We got a referral for audiology since she hasn't been screened since birth, I must say I am more nervous than I care to admit.