If you would like to go about your day without a punch in the face or feeling like a jackass when I call you out, please refrain from saying the following:
1. At least you don't/won't have to...
You have to realize what an ass you're about to make of yourself if these words ever escape you.
2. Ugh, you see what I have to deal with?! (with or without the accompaniment of a laugh)
I would kill to have to "deal" with my daughter rolling over during diaper changes, chase her because she crawls away from me or keep my food at a distance because she reaches for it. Get over yourself
3. Will she ever be normal?
Really...? Fuck you.
4. Do you ever wish...
I'm gonna go ahead and stop you right there.
5. "That's retarded, I'm/She/He is so retarded"
Shame on you and your ignorance. You are adult and should know better than to say that word, especially around the mother of a special needs child. I will no longer shrug this off or ignore it. Say this word around me, no matter what context and I WILL make you feel like an idiot. I realize majority of people who use this word are really referring to something or someone as "stupid, dumb, etc" So why not say that?? That's what you mean, isn't it? Choose you words carefully.
Ashlyn, although my daughter wasn't born with physical issues, she has mental disorders. I love everything you said in this post. People like this are either callous or just plain stupid and don't think about what they are saying/asking, which is still no excuse. I, too, have heard stupid things, but the kicker that sets me off is this one: "All she needs is a good ass whooping!" Or this one: "Just send her to my house for one day. I'll straighten her out." Really? WTF? I can tell what is normal teenage misbehavior and what is related to her mental disorders. She cannot be disciplined like most kids, it just doesn't work! Oh, and I forgot this one: "She doesn't look like she's got problems." Just because one can't see her mental illness doesn't mean it isn't there. I'm tired of people thinking that just because our children weren't born "normal" means they feel able to say whatever thought comes into their brain. You are an awesome Mom and Naysa is lucky to have you for her Mommy and my sweet friend Tori for her grandmommy! Hugs!
ReplyDeleteThat's ridiculous!!! I'm sorry people have said those things, pure ignorance. Thanks for posting :)
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry you have to cope with this type of person... sheer ignorance, i think of you and your family with love in my heart and would dearly love to meet you and the gorgeous little lady herself...
ReplyDeleteignore the ignorance Ashlyn, theyre not worthy of your thoughts /breath cos whilst your thinking/talking about them means your not talking of the sweetest little lady herself
i think people like you are amazing dealing with these sort of things that are sent to you, i believe God has handpicked special families to take care of his chosen few to love and to cherish little babies with special needs, God gave them to you cos He knew you would do your very best for them and not given to ignorant rude people like those you talk of... who would toss them aside and treat like trash...
i take great pleasure in knowing you if only through facebook God bless you all xxx Ignore the others theyre not worthy of your time xx love and hugs Liesa xx
Oh Sweetie, stupid people always suck. I'm sorry.
ReplyDelete